ENTRIES ARCHIVES PROFILE AFFILIATES

Sorry.
Friday, July 3, 2009

Hmm, saw her post. Abit sad. Many things to say. Shall post it here. I'm sorry if I say anything that will hurt you.

Hmm, all along, I know you're happy with him than with me, and you feel more love from him than me. Though you two always quarrel everyday. But the love is there. It's almost the same thing as my ex. She and 'Him' also always quarrel but like you, the love is there. And you're happy with him. I know I can never and I have never let my girlfriend feel the love before, not the past and not the present. All I let them feel was hurt, hurt and more hurt. It's always like this. I really envy SKL and 'HIM' though both of them always with you and my ex, but somehow you two love them more than loving me, feel the love from them more than me. And as you say, maybe it's because of the quarrel and arguments made you more and more close. Hais, I'm really scare that you'll leave me like how my ex leave me. You also can't forget the past, can't forget him. I know no one will remember the time they spend with, for there won't be a hapy memories with me.

Maybe just maybe, I shouldn't have appear, if not now maybe you'll be back to his side. Maybe I'm not suitable to fall into any relationship, for I only bring hurt to my girlfriend more than love. I'll not ask anything from you le, like asking who's better, who made you feel the love more. For I've know the anwer. And this answer will always be the same. You don't have to let go of the past, you don't have to force yourself to forget him. Cause I know you'll only hurt yourself more, and it's never easy to do that. Just take me a replacement of him, it's okay for me. I know I can't be compare to him. For he's always better in anything. Or maybe I shouldn't and don't even fit to compare to any other guys out there. For I'm always the worst, my lion I'm the worst, my sintua I'm the worst and even boyfriend, I still the worst.

Thanks for accepting me even though I'm the worst. No matter what I do, how much I want to care for you, take care of you, and love you. I'm still the worst. It'll never change. I don't want to let you go. I feel the love from you, I know it's true. But I really hope you made the right decision. I maybe the guy who's going to hurt you badly, like how much I hurt her. She left me because she feel hurt, and not love. I never blame her for leaving for she made the right choice, if one day you're leaving me for the same reason, I won't blame you too. I've only myself to blame. I really don't know to let my girlfriend feel the love they want, and give them the happiness they want.

Sorry dear, I didn't let feel the love you want. Sorry for being unhappy with me. Sorry for being the worst boyfriend you ever have. I didn't know you'll feel bored when you're with me, lucky there's him, somehow I think he's the only one who can give you the happiness you want, and the he's only guy who can make you feel loved. I've failed once again, I thought I can let you feel the love, but in the end I still fail to do that. Don't worry, I won't be asking you to meet so many days le, we won't be free to meet so many days also. Maybe if you want we'll just meet on saturday only bahr. I won't force you to meet anymore. I don't want you to hate me for wanting to meet you more. If you don't want to meet on saturday, just let me know when you want to meet. Ya?

I miss you loads. I know we've to be use to this kind of life. Sorry, I'll try to get use of it. I may not be a good boyfriend, may not let you feel the love, the happiness. And I know no matter how hard I try I may not be able to do that also. But please know this, I love you and I need you. I really don't want to end this relation with you leaving me. I want to end this relation having you as my wife and have a happy life with me. I know the life with may not the life you want, I know I'm always controlling you, don't let you do this do that. But it's because I care. If you don't want and dislike what I'm doing. I'll stop controlling you. As long as you don't hate. You can leave me for doing that, but please don't hate me. I've already made someone hate me, I don't want to have the second one.

Dear, I've faith in you, that you won't leave me and love me truly. But one day maybe just one day, you feel that your love for have faded, or have fallen for someone, just let me know immediately, don't keep it from me, cause I'll be hurt more and more de. Lastly, I love you, I really want to take you as my wife. But as you say, let's take steps by steps bahr. I won't force you to do anything anymore. Cause somehow I've don't the right and I'm fit to do that. I'm sorry if this post you. But I just want you to know. Baby love you loads.

Signing off.
N.Boy ):
17:29pm
03.07.09